She’s just not that into you if:

Discalimer: In an effort to help 50% of the population, well certain clueless indivuduals who are part of that 50%, I have decided to write this. I may be right or I may be wrong. It's honestly up for discussion. But let's hope that whatever part of this post that is found to be universally acknowledged as truth may end up reducing some of the frustration and confusion in the world. Happy reading!

1. She tells you she’s not into you.

No means no. End of story. No woiyee stories or persistence will help your situation. In fact it’ll have just the opposite effect. You become an irritating nuisance.

2. She’s always too busy.

If a girl really likes you she will make time to spend with you. Engagements will be re-scheduled; her girls will understand when she cancels on them. Trust me, she will find a way to fit you into her day/week.

3. She doesn’t respond to your text messages.

Or when she does respond, it’s after an obscenely long period of time with no explanation whatsoever. Here’s a little secret, when a girl get a text from a guy she really likes she does this mental (sometimes physical) ‘Ohmigosh’ dance. And then she calms down, regains some composure and texts back immediately. If she doesn’t have credit she will buy some using Mpesa or Airtel money etc. If she doesn’t have any money on Mpesa she will kopa credo/okoa jahazi! Where there’s a will there’s a way! Trust me.

4. You never finish conversations with her because she suddenly remembers stuff she needs to do.

So you ‘accidentally’ bump into her (Let’s pretend it was accidental because we all know that what you really did was show-up at one of her usual hang-outs hoping to bump into her) and then you exchange pleasantries, and before the conversation goes any further she looks at her watch/phone and suddenly has to go meet this really good friend of hers or realizes how late she is for some appointment. Now here’s the best part, it happens every single time you see her! Without fail! Same applies to rushed phone conversations. Dude, stop being naive!

5. She looks like she wants to hide under a rock every time she sees you.

Hey she might actually hide behind something/someone when she sees you. Avoidance tactics 101.

6. She ignores your comments and messages on social media, despite the fact that she uses it a lot!

Enough said. Kindly refer to point number 3 for a further explanation.

7. She struggles with giving you a title when she has to introduce to someone.

Let me give you an example. You have conveniently ‘bumped into’ her and then some other person she knows actually bumps into her for real. Therefore she needs to make introductions. So she says something like, “This is...umm..._____” (Insert suitable name in the gap). Not “This is my (good) friend ____” or anything like that. In fact, she will probably not offer any further information about you. That story will die like that. But this other someone, the one who bumped into her for real, will get an introduction complete with a title, back-story and current information!

8. She goes out with some other guy and comes to tell you about it

This one is so obvious! I don’t know why I’m even writing it down. *le sigh*. Fine, let me spell it: F-r-i-e-n-d-z-o-n-e

On a lighter note...

Ciao!!!